Sunday, 15 February 2015

My ideal valentine #UnconditionalLove with the Zenfone

This post has been written for the Indiblogger contest

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Its that time of the year when we all sit down to think about the most important part of human life, love. We try our best to connect with the loved ones, especially that one person who is your valentine. The definition of a valentine is quite broad but in the practical world, we use this word to refer to that one most important person in your life.

Capturing the best moments of life

Life becomes beautiful with memories, and memories are captured with images. You never know when life surprises you. It isn't possible for us to carry a camera with us all the time to capture memories. The best alternative is to have a wonderful camera fitted in to your phone. The Asus Zenfone comes with a Pixel Master camera with auto focus, making it a superior bet. It helps in capturing those moments that will be treasured forever, with great resolution and sharpness. Further, the full HD video recording is an icing on the cake. It will be my best valentine, considering I love taking photos and recording moments.

I love things that look beautiful

The Zenfone's aesthetic design is something that I am in love with. Though simple, the phone's texture, structure, and the overall look is greatly done. When I hold it in my hand, I feel like I should hold it on forever. That's exactly what you feel when you hold your valentine in your hands. It is well built, edged appropriately, and the concentric design finish at the bottom is awesome. Further, the case colors that come with the Zenfone are so vibrant that one can easily fall in love with them. It is also possible to have a new color on your phone with the replaceable back covers, making you feel fresh about what you hold in your hands, at almost all the time of the day.

The touch and the feel

Another reason I would like to have the Zenfone as my valentine is because it offers a great touch experience. Touch sensitivity is perhaps the best and most important aspect of a smartphone, just like how understanding is the most important aspect of a relationship. When your valentine understands exactly what you communicate, there is nothing like it. When you have a valentine who is so responsive, life becomes easier and more interesting.

Long term sustainability is the key

When you are certain that your valentine is here for the long run, you become more confident. The long life battery of the Asus Zenfone is such a value addition. Considering it has a low power consumption and a very efficient internal design, it great enhanced battery life and I don't have to worry about looking for a charger at all the times. Having a charged up valentine all day is such a wonderful experience. These days we like to stay connected to the internet all day, either through wifi or mobile networks, and battery life becomes all the most important of the phone.

Being open is the key to having a close relationship

There shouldn't be any hide and seek within a relationship. Everything should open, clean and clear. It helps in getting closer, as inhibitions are shed. It adds immense value when all parties to a relationship are in a position to contribute to it. The open source android software is a live example of how contribution from multiple parties can create a great platform. Being able to access such a platform on the Zenfone is great. There are plenty of options to explore, experiment and experience.

In the end, I would love to have a Zenfone as my valentine this valentine's day. It makes a perfect partner that adds great value to life, making it better in several ways. After all, that's exactly what valentines do.

Thursday, 1 January 2015

Entrepreneurial Traits from Residential Schooling - A Case Study


Every year, around 2000 of the brightest 10 year olds get into Sainik Schools with a mission to spend the next 7 years preparing for a career in the Armed Forces. The children run a proven routine intended to build officer like qualities in them. Not everyone is able to clear through the rigorous schooling and nearly half of them drop out by Class XII. A good number of students successfully get into the National Defence Academy, and those who don’t, have this immense challenge to come back to the civilian world and refuel their dreams. It appears, initially, an easy task as these students have been through an education system that has taught them to be physically fit, mentally tough and emotionally balanced, but as the students start this new life, this thought fades. The new life is tougher as the parameters of assessment of performance are different. Unlike the school where there is standardization of almost everything, the world outside works on different set of rules. I always wondered how do the education and learning experiences at residential schools that work primarily on a singular aim help children when they aren’t pursuing that aim any further. The basic principles of life, like honesty, truth, discipline, hard work, consistent efforts, etc., are the same across professions but there are some niche skills that one needs to acquire to gain expertise in a profession.

I had this wonderful opportunity to spend time with Ajeets who decided to start their own businesses. The number is really small at roughly 2% of the students who have passed out from the school. There could be several reasons. Firstly, most of us hail from lower middle class families and we have to support our families, and so, we try to get a job as soon as possible. In fact, I heard stories of people who joined the school just because they were assured a square meal a day. Secondly, we have very little knowledge about business or entrepreneurship as these are topics outside our syllabus or scope. There could also be generic reasons like dull economic conditions, unviable business opportunities, limited exposure, lack of funds, etc. While I discussed these points with them, we realized that the training at school, surprisingly, has helped them in numerous ways to be better businessmen. Although there was no formal business curriculum in the school, the traits acquired in the school have been of immense help to them.

Education for Life

When in school, Lt Cdr (Retd) CV Prakash, a hydroponics expert, asked Kannath sir, faculty of mathematics, “Where are we going to use all these things in life?”, when Pythagoras theorem was being taught, to which Kannath sir replied, “You’ll remember me the day you use it”. 30 years since then, when CV was building his greenhouse, he struggled to calculate the sizes to lay the structure and it was then that he applied the Pythagoras theorem. Of course, these lessons are a part of the curriculum. The differentiator is that our teachers spent 16-18 hours every day with us. At 5.30am, we had our hostel superintendent ensuring we get up, have a cup of tea and reach the ground. At 6.00am, we had our PT teachers jacking us off. From 7.30am to 1.30pm, our classes run. At lunch, teachers accompanied us. At 4.00pm, they played basketball, volleyball, football, hockey, cricket, etc. with us. At 6.30pm, they would join us in the evening preps. At 8.30pm, they would be there at dinner. After dinner, they would stay back for an hour or two to help us in our studies. The next day, they are back. Vaatsalys Hospital’s co-founder, Dr Veero, who believes strongly that the school gave him all that which has made him whatever he is today, says that this realization literally shook him up when he thought of this later in life, though he never felt anything unusual about it when he was at school. There is a lot of difference between an exam of marks and an exam of life. We were built for life, at school.

Hard Work is the key to success

Unlike B-Schools, where smart work is stressed as an essential trait, schools like ours believe in hard work. Practically, it isn’t fair to compare these two as each of these have different applications and are intended for different objectives. In many cases, I have seen how entrepreneurs toiled all the way, despite there being options to take short cuts or make smart moves. They opined that smart work works in the short run only. In the long run, only hard work will persist. Of course, there were also instances where I could notice how they made smart moves in their business, which proves that they aren’t altogether void of smart work, but the focus is on hard work.

Honesty is the best policy

Environment makes people. For someone who has spent his childhood, the learning years, at a school like SSBJ, severing values is worse than anything else. A man who has spent his life with honesty, integrity and truth is a true success in himself. The greatest success lies in being able to hold our heads high and walk happily. The school taught us in practice that the past cannot be changed, the future cannot be seen and the present is all that we have. May be, the school taught us the art of living, and when you know how to take control of life, you can do all that you want to do with it.

Vijay Idagal of VM Enterprises says, “Honesty is tough to practice in business and practicing it has paid me tremendously in the long run in nonmonetary terms”. The school has built us from raw kids to men with mettle. The value system was drilled in our DNA and it has helped us significantly. We have learnt commanding respect rather than demanding it. The language of fear and enticement work in the short run, and only right understanding works in the long run.

Health is Wealth

Mould Makers’ founder Satish Laxmapur spoke about how he burnt the midnight oil and topped the class year after year at NTTF, after SSBJ. He also excelled in sports and athletics and realized how big a role the school had played in strengthening him when he could easily run a stretch of 20 kms between Hubli and Dharwad for a social event. “Most of my friends maintain strong health even today. It is because we have built our body that way since our childhood. Work keeps me so busy that I hardly find time to exercise. Having a good health has been a great boon to me”, says Satish.

The Moral Sense of Responsibility

The fact that you are from SSBJ makes people around you look up to you and that alone is enough motivation to do well in life and live by values. The SSBJ legacy has been a factor that many agree as the reason for them to desire to excel in everything they do, and also not fall prey to fallacies. Responsibility was brewed in us at a young age by making us accountable for our lives, assigning tasks, providing leadership roles, and asking us to perform in a very competitive environment. Some of the most basic lessons like ‘Don’t carry class (work) to house (home)’, ‘Accept (mistakes) and move on’, ‘Disputes of house (home/family) should never be brought in open’, ‘You always get more by giving’, ‘You have no rights to the results, but only the liability of efforts’ and so on, were ingrained in our life and these have played a big role in shaping us into better individuals.

Risk taking abilities are a part of our value system

Capt Sandesh, who heads Edu Asia schools says, “The school taught us to take decisions with calculated risks at a great speed. Amid all adventure, we also committed mistakes and corrected them at a very young age. The morals learnt are a part of our system without our notice. There was no choice at school for many things. There was only one way, the right way. The school guided us to travel that path, either by choice or by force, and today, we take that path impeccably. Staying together, especially in times of distress, has made us humble. Our decisions, our value systems, are all due to the stories of past. In simplest words, the value systems of life were injected in our blood streams at the school”.

Nageshwar Rao, founder of Asmaitha was reminded of the quote “Hope for the best and be prepared for the worst”, which he heard numerous times at school when he decided to quit his job. He asked himself, “What if I fail?”, and pat, the answer was, “I will get back to job”. Risks appear as opportunistic situations when you start looking at them this way. As young blood in a disciplined residential school, we faced several situations where we want to break a rule, no matter what it brings to us. Everyone has their own adventures of jumping gates, going out to watch a movie without permissions, midnight swimming, etc. and each of these have again taught the lessons of calculated risk taking. The adventures would never stop, after all, the passion kept driving us to take all the risks to do what we desired to. Funny enough, each time we were caught, we learnt the strength of unity, and it only kept strengthening.

Come what may, I am ready for it.

One of the most disastrous stories I heard was that of Anand Vijapur, who was diagnosed with cancer at a time when his business, Aasptek Handling Solutions, was in trouble too. He spoke of how the cross country races on Saturday morning taught us to be determined and never give up, despite this double shock. He couldn’t afford to lose hope, at least not in front of his children. He kept battling cancer for 3 years, alongside struggling to set his business back on track, which he did successfully, before he succumbed to fate last year. While he smiled to tell me that he was blessed with great health for 40 years and he should be thankful to God for that, I was terrified and literally shook at his courage.

Nagendra Mali of Navachetana speaks about how the support extended to him by everyone helped him mellowing down, stop fighting and start learning. “For me, personally, school added tremendous value. It gave me a lot of courage, corrected my mistakes and helped me develop my thought process, which is very important in taking right business decisions. I do not hesitate to say that if I was not an Ajeet, I could not have faced most situations that came up later in life”, says Nagendra.

Management by Leadership, Marketing Naturally

Discipline, undoubtedly, is the element that everyone stressed as one of the most important lessons from SSBJ. The NCC parade, mass PT and group activities were great contributors to this front. Discipline in every action and even the thought flow process has helped him make better decisions.

We observe that managers these days tend to dictate employees about what to do. Of course debatable on the grounds of creativity, the fact remains that effective team management can be done by managers who can lead by example, unless there is an employee in the team who is taking up that role. Initiative has been injected our blood at very early stages of life. A very important point to note in the process of initiative is that the person has to continue being a team player first.

In the process of preparing for debates, assembly speeches, SSB interview, and going through hundreds of discussions for events, competitions, parties, etc. has helped us to build our communication skills and abilities to convince people. Shivaling Kodule, who runs Aishil Engineering, says, “I didn’t know a word in English when I joined school. Over the years, the school transformed me in several ways. Today, when I sit in front of my customer and present, I feel I already have won half the battle. Without our notice, we have implemented the management principle of ‘Sell yourself, the product gets sold on its own’ into our lives and the most important point to note here is we don’t do it strategically or with a plan. It comes to us naturally.”

Getting connected to people, Effortless Human Resources Management

Great relationships are built when people open up their lives. “Employees feel very happy when we help them with anything. This comes naturally to us. Everyone sees what’s good in others but points out what is bad. However, we have been, from day one, pointing out what is good. It really takes guts to tell someone that he is better than you, to tell someone that he played better. Football taught us to appreciate strengths”, says RK Patil, CEO of Vayavya Labs, “Seeing a dream and assembling a team are critical elements that go in to determine how successful your venture will be. Every individual is different and connecting with them all with the same energy is challenging. Every individual is important. At the end of the day, it’s about the company and the company is about the people who make it.”

People work for salaries, to begin with. Then, they work for their passion. Further, they work due to their association. Every entrepreneur I spoke to told me unequivocally that they have been able to maintain very healthy and cordial relationships with colleagues and employees as they learnt to be sensible and responsible, sharing and caring, concerned and grateful during the 7 years at school. ‘Own up’ are two words that heard almost every day. Ajeet entrepreneurs realize that if these feelings can be replicated in employees by creating conducive environment, it can work wonders for the organization, and they make conscious efforts to have such an environment.

Successful people value relationships

Ramesh Bhat, a former stock broker, says, “I learnt early in life from the school that no amount of money, wine and women can satisfy men, and this helped me to resist all temptations of the fancy world of finance offered. If not for the strong self-discipline, stronger financial discipline, and even stronger focus on building strong relationships with clients ethically, I wouldn’t have survived in the stock markets. I’ve known that knowledge and education is the greatest gift that can suffice life”, says Ramesh, who has spent the last 10 years volunteering tirelessly to further better the facilities, infrastructure and overall education at the school. The school has taught us to practice what we preach.

In the long run, good schools are named so by what the alumni does for the world. The educational institutes become successful if they can ignite the fire in the bellies of the students. The ‘anthah prerana’ (Inner Motivation) is high in good schools.  We have learnt the true meaning of competitive spirit. We would be the worst of enemies on the ground, and when out of the battlefield, we became the best of buddies. Unknowingly, our minds developed ahead of our age and we became our own support system. By the time we reach 12th, we were, like, done with life.

“It is easy to philosophize today but those moments were undeniably awesome. Our relationships are so strong that we almost cry even today when we depart after meeting and our wives are thoroughly confused”, says Milind Katti, co-founder of QEDBaton, “The school alumni meets are unique gatherings. I attend my college alumni meets which are mainly to network and speak business. At school meets, you only speak love, love and love. It may not happen anywhere else in the world. But then, the speed at which needy get help from the alumni is blazing fast. Even this doesn’t happen anywhere.”

On the other side of the edge, as close to the river

Someone has rightly said, “Security is mostly an illusion. It does not exist in nature. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing”. We have learnt to embrace risks wisely and work towards solutions. While Sainik Schools have an impeccable record of meeting their primary objective of training children to join the Armed Forces, the schools have been doing extremely well in their secondary objective of turning the children into useful citizens. We have learnt from day one that life doesn’t run to our specifications as we are not its only stakeholders. With all these inputs from entrepreneurs, we can conclude that the race of life needs the same elements to win, in varying proportions. An education system like ours empowers us with all the traits that we need to live life. Being responsible for our lives, taking risks, building everlasting relationships, sticking together in difficult times and all times, support everyone to move up and enormous multitasking skills are some value additions from the school life that entrepreneurs tick as most helpful.

Do you have it in you?

Often, we were asked this question at school, before any competition/event. This reminds me of funny instance when someone answered, “Yes, I have it in you”, and he had a terrible day after that. Jokes apart, I feel that the learning and experiences at school has built us into strong individuals and we all have the abilities to do all that we want to do, including building businesses. Air Deccan, Jolle Samuha, Magod Lasers, Adept Foundation, Flexitron, Sante Mernaud are some more examples of business houses that Ajeets have built. 

The Indian economy is expected to flourish on a new path of growth, creating opportunities for all of us. This new world needs new people, new thoughts, new ideas, lest we fall back in the same cyclical phenomenon. After my interaction with Ajeet entrepreneurs, I feel that we are not only positioned to take up these opportunities but it is also our responsibility to take them up. There is ample evidence across the world that a B-School degree is not essential, though helpful, to run a business. Our stories further prove this. If you have been thinking to do something and have been pausing for some reason, I encourage you to take these inputs and make a wise decision. There is a great support system within you and a greater one around you. 

Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t; you are right”.

Start UP!

Saturday, 27 December 2014

Speaking Truth always is the easiest way to a better life

This post has been exclusively written for Coca Cola's Kinley Mineral Water, in association with IndiBlogger.

The first lesson we all learn in schools is, "Honesty is the best policy", and truth, perhaps, is the foundation of this policy. We are advised from day one to speak truth, truth and only truth, and yet, we do not (or can not?) follow this policy all the time. Mahatma Gandhi is once known to have said that we must follow the situation truth. For example, if a set of thieves ask you where the treasure is, better guide them in the wrong direction.

My experiments (or encounters?) with truth have been many. Oftentimes, when things are not in our favor, speaking truth seems to only add more trouble in the moment, but in the long run, it will be of great help. It is always a good policy to accept mistakes, be humble and speak the facts. After all, the facts can't be hidden for a long time. In the end, everything comes out in the open.

I was the goalie for the school football team and we were preparing for the inter school matches. I was made the goalkeeper in the last moment as the person who was set to be the goalie faced some serious injuries. So, we had this final practice match with a local football team, and were under tremendous pressure to win it. It was a prestige issue for the school, and all the dignitaries were present on this occasion. We wanted to show that we are right team to go to the inter school matches.

The match went on well in the first half. The local team was a very strong one. They had spent 3-4 years playing football and some players had played state level matches as well. We were at 1-1 after the first half. They had scored the first goal in the first minute and our moral was down. We scored our goal, partially by luck, as a result of a penalty kick.

In the second half, both the teams had become very aggressive. We scored a goal and took the lead, 2-1. There were some attacks on our goalpost. In an instance, the ball was kicked towards me and I caught it. However, I fell down very close to the goal post boundary. The opposition claimed that I was inside the goalpost when I took the ball and we claimed that I was outside. I was in a dilemma. I felt (or knew?) that I had taken the ball inside the line, and thus it should be a goal in their favor. The issue went on for quite some time and the umpire put the ball in my court. We had no time to lose, and I took advantage of this moment and declared that I took it clean. So, we ended up winning the match. While everyone celebrated, I kept a pale face and really did not enjoy the moment. The guilt had hit me.

It took time to get rid of this guilt. It also affected my confidence and stability to some extent. Finally, in the inter school matches, we faced similar situations, where umpire decisions went against us, and it was like, a tit for tat. In the end, we said, "Everything is fair in love and war", and the scoreboard is the truth, as far as the sport is concerned. When I saw scoreboard in our favor in the finals, I was thrilled. We all were. That was the moment, we had won, not just the match, but much more.

They say, "You can't change the truth, but it can change you".

Saturday, 20 December 2014

Say NO to Pre-Marital Sex, Patience Pays in Multiples

This blog post has been exclusively penned for IndiBlogger's "Yes or No to Pre-Marital Sex" contest. Check Poonaam Uppal's True Love - A Mystical True Love Story on Flipkart.

Historically, the world has been a strict and disciplined place. Over time, a large number of relaxations have been coming in and the world is a more liberal place now. Democracy has put an end to autocracy and dictatorship. We have seen a great change in way we life, the quality of life, the thoughts, etc. From a time when women were asked to be within the four walls with their bodies covered fully with clothes, we have reached world that accepts them uncover into a 2-piece on a beach. Some call it freedom, some call it by some other name. Marriages were meant to last all life, or rather, 7 janams (lives) and today, perhaps, we have started the 8th janam and thus relationships are a means to achieve goals, financial ones on a growth now. Many things that were considered wrong or illegal in the past are painted as art today, and people enjoy them in the name of freedom. Everything has its own advantages and disadvantages. Life should mix things in the right proportion for it to be a fulfilling experience. Too much or too less of anything is a negative.

It all starts with Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, goes to Kaho Naa Pyaar Hai, further to Mohabbatein, gets into a bit of Pyar Kiya Toh Darna Kya, then if all goes well until Mujhse Shaadi Karoge, and reaches a Shaadi Mubarak!. Unfortunately, these people are made to feel Shaadi Karke Phas Gaya, with stories of Khwaaish, Jism, LSD, taking over their thoughts. There are enough people promoting promiscuous content, which gives immediate fame (though negative) to them. Pre Marital Sex (PMS) is a development from these thoughts over a period of time. I am against PMS, at least at the moment, and strongly believe that one must wait till marriage to enjoy the bliss of sex. Its not about moral, ethics, religion, virginity or anything. Its just that the sun rises, flowers blossom, fruits ripen at a particular time, and they are best enjoyed then. While we can debate on several points, I have tried to highlight such points that I think are more important in the longer run of life.
Genital sex is an expression of intimacy, not the means to intimacy. True intimacy springs from verbal and emotional communion. True intimacy is built on a commitment to honesty, love and freedom. True intimacy is not primarily a sexual encounter. Intimacy, in fact, has almost nothing to do with our sex organs.
- Alice Fryling

Sex follows marriage.

It is a known fact that people start having sex after marriage, and not before. However, with the so called modern society, things are a bit different. People tend to get married at a later age than usual. In the meantime, the physical desires keep increasing. Thus, they decide to indulge in PMS. Most of them know this is wrong (at least they know that it is claimed to be wrong) but they go ahead and do it. First, they try their best to hide it. However, if they are caught, they try to approve of it in order to avoid a lifetime's shame. There is all probability that these people find great difficulties adjusting to married life, unless they get married to someone who also has committed the same act.

Sex and Marriage are 2 different things. Really?

In the next level of arguments, we have people who claim that sex and marriage are completely different. In the olden times, people would search for social and financial security through marriages. So, you go and find these things. Today, people are also searching for sexual outcomes, and so, you get to try the other person and decide. I am appalled when I hear such reasoning, despite there being enough evidence that forced (mostly because one person questions the other person on the basis of love), premarital lovemaking leads to mental depression and dilemma. The Supreme Court of India has held in its judgement that PMS is not a crime but it is considered equal to marriage. Thus, PMS isn't a substitute. The proponents of this idea are often those who see sex as just another activity in life. If so, why do the same people do not approve of their spouses committing adultery. Its just another physical activity, after all. Most arguments in favor of PMS become null and void when they are applied to post marriage sex with a different individual (other than the spouse). Sex with multiple partners isn't an adventure. I believe these aren't withing the scope of PMS. I mean, if you don't intend to get married, you aren't having a PMS, you're just having sex.

Sex with a partner is alright. No.

No relationship gives us the right to sex. People often interpret marriage as a license to sex. This is extremely weird. Marriage is a sacred institution that brings 2 people together under a vow to live a better life. Sex is just one one part of life. Today's world has made the significance of sex go out of proportion, thanks to the Bollywood and Hollywood. All the movies have to show a sex scene and unfortunately, movies aren't about husbands and wives. So, they end up showing partners making out. It all looks rosy because movies have a happy ending. The script is written that way. Unfortunately, life doesn't give us that freedom. Apart from all the risks that PMS poses, including pregnancy, the 2volume of stress and issues it can create, if one thing goes wrong, are enormous. There are books, stories and movies on what happens to people if they do not get to live with the partner who they have courted with. On reading/watching these, all the propositions around sex being a stress buster get beaten, hands down.

Youngsters are misled.

The media that youngsters watch/listen often portrays things in a way that people decide to adopt to their concept. Often, these people themselves are confused about their own thoughts. Unless Durex says PMS is good, they can't increase their condom sales. Deodorants don't get men to bed. Lingerie doesn't necessarily lead to one night stands. Things are portrayed in a very ugly and awkward fashion these days. The other day, I was watching a video, 'My advice to 15 year old'. It turned out to be a big disappointment. The video asks the 15 year old children to ignore studies, spend time in doing other things, and experiment with sex. How cheap an advice could be? Don't these people understand that most 15 year old kids don't even have their organ developed fully yet. Pursuing passions for life is great, but ignoring the basics like education is fatal. In the name of passion, a lot of wrong communication reaches the younger lot, like Bill Gates dropped out, Zuck dropped out, etc. A set of people who have been wrong themselves, try to promote their wrongs by asking the world to do the same wrongs, so that it becomes a standard and then, gets accepted in the society. Young people must watch out and understand whether opinions expressed in news and newspapers are public opinion or the opinions of the individuals. Most news articles come with news on topics like PMS and to support, they include comments from people who are pro-PMS, thus giving an image that the world is pro-PMS. It could be with any topic. Sex sells, and marketers know it the best.


The lesser I speak, the better. I don't believe in moral lectures. I am sure that those who are in support of PMS are mature enough to understand things. So, I'd just ask them to place a hand on their heart and ask themselves, "Am I really right? Would I approve of PMS if my spouse or parents (had) or children indulge in it?".

Sex and Rape.

A lot of people interpret things related to these in a totally different ways. Some call it cultural issue, some social, some mental, some physical, and some even think that rapes just happen by mistake. Unfortunately, we also have people who think that boys will be boys and they will rape. Does such a comment represent the entire male community? How many people are such people representing? What happens to initiatives like MARD? It is a proven fact that people try to replicate what is done in movies. When Kareena Kapoors dance to songs like "main toh tandoori murgi hoon yaar, pachkale mujhe alcohol se", what is the message she is sending? The women's groups never agitate against things like this, calling it freedom of expression. Why don't they understand that women are being commodity-sed by women themselves? It is a confused world, and there are people taking disadvantage of these confusions.

Is PMS a new form of rape, rape with consent?

As long as things go the jolly Bollywood style, all is well. However, shockingly, according to the National Crime Records Bureau 2013 annual report, 24,923 rape cases were reported across India in 2012. Out of these, 24,470 were committed by a known person, a staggering 98%. Of these, it is obvious that a large number were PMS with consent, and then because one of the partners decides against the relationship post-PMS, it is called a rape. Tragic, isn't it? Worse enough, if the partner again decided to get back in the relationship, the rape is redefined as PMS. According to the HT-MaRS Youth Survey, an over 61% of today's believe that premarital sex is no longer a taboo, thanks to the influenced illusions around them. However, when it comes to marriage, over 63% want their partners to be virgins. These are the same people who proclaim that virginity is a thing of the past. Double standards?

Rise in love, take time to grow your relationship, focus on the long run, live life.

It is thus evident that PMS does no good to anyone. It is like risking a jump from a 10 floor building, assuming we'll get Spiderman's web or batman's wings on the way. While Batman & Spiderman do win, as they are scripted to, the blind jumpers suffer consequences. Not everyone's life can be like Chetan and Anusha of 2 States. Don't be guided on the things that someone isn't trying to guide you on. Don't be motivated by consequences as your situation is always different from others and thus, will see different consequences. For all the points mentioned above and for many other regular reasons that we keep hearing day in and day out, I appeal to the young generation to abstain from the disillusions and traps laid to monetize you. Live by the basic values and principles of life. It is age old quote, which we all know and yet, don't follow, "You always have 2 choices. One is a little wrong, but will give you immediate success and happiness. The other one is a little tough, but will take you on the right path. Success may come or may not, but you will always be happy for taking the right path". Use the time that you get before marriage to focus on education, work and career, instead of focusing on PMS. Sex is an insignificant element in building a long term relationship value. What matters the most in life is how happily you live with your life partner, and that needs endless love from the heart. Each moment you spend waiting teaches you the art of controlling your life, and doubtlessly, each of these moments are adding up for a great sex life for you both in the future.

Let's not take relationships on the commercial path, try to look for benefits, or to find what will I get from this. True love has no means, nor ends.

Let love be the reason, lifelong friendship be the gift, kindness is the cause and till death do us apart be the length. Lets vow a Happy Married Life, and give it all that it takes!
It is the holiest institution of human relationships mankind is aware of...



Thursday, 18 December 2014

Get the best out of a vacation #TeddyTravelogues

This blog post has been exclusively written for Club Mahindra's contest on IndiBlogger. Visit to plan your vacation.

Vacations were the most awaited days of my life when I was a kid. Unsurprisingly, even today. After all, who doesn't like some break from the routine? I studied in a residential school, where sporting activities, adventure events, games, etc. were a part of the routine. So, for me, vacation was more about spending time with parents, other friends and relatives. It would also involve some travel.

If I get an opportunity to take some kids on vacation, I would take them through different experiences. Overall development of children happens when they are exposed to different fields and get to learn more about life. I would encourage them to use this time to focus on their hobbies. Drawing, painting, stamp collection, poem writing, etc, make a child creative. Physical activities would be another area of focus. Kids love to play. I would encourage them to go out and play rather than sit with the TV or computer games. Learning music, dance, swimming, among others, adds significantly to their personality.

Kids love to spend time with elder people as they get pampered. Planning a small trip or a few days at their native places, more of it is a village, will be a great experience. The green fields, cattle, fresh milk and food, clean environment, peace and tranquility is bound to create a meaningful experience and awaken their souls to beauty of the nature.

No vacation is complete without a visit to a theme park or a nice hangout place. It could be the Essel world, Wonder la, Ramoji Film City, Innovative Film City, etc. Places like these make kids very excited and happy. In the hindsight, they also see how these wonderful places have been built. They are inspired.

A visit to a religious place and a places of historical importance will definitely be on my list. I feel that these have a great impact on the children in the long run. Kids do a lot of interesting things at temples. They learn that there is always someone who they can look up to for help, support and solutions. Spirituality makes a person humble as people get to know that they are not the ultimatum in the world. Historical places add great value to learning. Moreover, these places are also covered in their classes and visiting them in person is a great experience.

Another important task I would plan in a vacation is nothing. Yes, nothing. Being able to do nothing is a task in itself as life demands everyone to do something all through the day. I would encourage them to take a full time break from everything, spend some time lazing around, keep the mind blank, relax fully, and only do such things that they love to do from the core of their hearts. It could be anything including eating, sleeping, watching TV, singing, playing or whatever. Being able to spend time the way one wants is a great booster to life. It helps to rejuvenate and get ready for life after vacation with great zeal and energy.

The winter and summer breaks also come with festivals and kids love to celebrate festivals. So, it is important to ensure that we celebrate them along with the kids. We must take time off and celebrate joyfully.

Thus, I would balance the vacation time in a way that the kids get to do what they want as well as they do what they are supposed to do. With these few initiatives, I feel that kids will be able to make the best out of their holidays.